Do you have a habit of letting go of your peace and joy only to take hold of something of no value? I do.
My head swims. I become absorbed with unanswered questions and the unknown future. It distracts me. I feel rushed and pressed down because I don’t trust God’s plans for me. Are those plans wonderful by my definition or His?
Peace and joy from the Holy Spirit are a free gift. Yet I put them down and pick up stress about what I can’t control and preoccupation with tomorrow. Now I’m unfocused. Time is wasted trying to fix a tomorrow I’m not even sure is broken. Ultimately today dies in tomorrow’s shadow.
All of these feelings and thoughts create chaos. So I stuff them deep down into a dark brain cavity no longer conscience of them. Emotion Stuffer morphs into Mommy Moment meltdowns.
Out of sight out of mind doesn’t work for my unresolved feelings and thought processes. Maybe I’m too analytical but I have to sort and organize until I discover the root of my problems.
This problem-solving method was implemented a while ago to avoid buying another ticket for the same merry-go-round ride I never wanted to ride on in the first place. I’ve learned that circumstances and situations tend to repeat themselves. Be prepared for the inevitable.
Introspection often reveals the unflattering.
I rooted around in my own head and asked the tough questions. Why isn’t God’s plan for my tomorrow good enough for me? What if it’s not my ideal tomorrow? What if God plans for me to do more growing and growing often means discomfort. I don’t want to be uncomfortable. Why can’t I be uncomfortable? Am I spoiled? Am I selfish? Whose plan is more important?
My self-reflection revealed a few issues…
Trust and faith? Lacking. Understanding Biblical truth, getting there. Walking that truth out, hmm…needs work. Control issues… maybe… okay probably.
Journaling as I talked with God worked all this out. It allowed me to dump the chaos onto paper so God could illuminate the Truth. He reminded me of a few verses.
I didn’t trust God about tomorrow.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV
I didn’t trust God’s Kingdom plans.
I needed to walk out what I know to be true from the Word of God.
“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:5 NIV
We all need to take captive our thoughts so that we don’t give away the precious gifts from the Holy Spirit. We can focus on today’s blessings and not worry about tomorrow’s what-ifs.